50 life lessons.

2020. This year marks my 50th year. I woke up without a hangover this morning and thought "well, I've learned some things". Then I wrote down a bunch more things I have learned. I'm not writing this to tell you how to live your life. These are lessons I have picked up by making a…

Hands.

I was riding in an Uber in New Mexico and was struck by my drivers hands. She was about my age, straddling that line between her 40s and 50's. That age where your clothes or hair might not give away your age, but your face and hands sure do. She was listening to the local…

Growing up.

My son was recently going through his "old" room, (having upgraded twice as each older sibling moved out) and found a whole bunch of his "treasures". Included in this category: a bag of broken crap collected from the street while walking home from elementary school, a chunk of concrete, stuffed animals, bouncy balls (around 100…

6 years.

6 years ago today my last long term relationship ended. It was really sad, and it wasn't my call, but I completely agreed with him. For awhile we stayed friends and after awhile we weren't anymore. There are still days I want to pick up the phone and call Chris and tell him something about…

The Non-Anniversary.

A note to my 21-year-old self, on what would have been your 26th Anniversary. I can still picture you sitting on blue carpet in your veil and flannel shirt. Sitting in your sister’s old bedroom, leaning against the bed. I remember your doubts that day. I remember how you dried your tears, squared your shoulders,…

Rivers and Roads.

The last month or so, I've had a bunch of stuff swimming around in my head, my heart. Thoughts of impermanence, loss, life, meaning, past, present, future. Relationships, job. Children. Friends. People you know, people who dig deep, and people who leave. Life is a trip. Literally. I started my day today at an Estate…

Living.

There are things in life we have very little control over. When an illness strikes, depression takes over, mother nature rains down her wrath, a moronic cheeto gets voted into office, some things you just don't have much of a say in. At points over the  last few years  I was looking around at my life, and…